What I've Learned From Relationships

Written by Linda Mains

Wow, a woman's life...when I was 4 my Grandmother informed me, that all men cheat. At that time I was really ill equipped to handle that information. Then one day at the ripe old age of 5 years of age, I found my mother crumpled on the bedroom floor that she shared with my father, crying her eyes out, because she had found his secret stash of women's phone numbers. What could I do to comfort my mother? I was only 5 years old, all I do know is that even at the age of 5 I knew how to hate my father for what he had done to my mother. Something that has taken me most of my life to forgive him for. So what was my lesson as a little girl from my fathers cheating? I learned under no circumstances should I ever trust any man 100% of the time.

Men, we can't live with them...and we can't, um, what was that, oh, with them? I was watching a movie about an in home Ohio mom in the 50's who was a contester. Now a contester was usually a wife and mother that entered all the sweepstakes back in the 40's, 50's and 60's. Anyway the wife turned contester in that movie who's also the main character had a mean drunk of a husband, whom spent all his cash on getting shit faced drunk every night. Now this saint of a mother had 12 children, women back in the day where much more patient with their men, but then she was from Ohio. I don't want to say this but it seems to me that a majority of the men from the Mid West are...I don't want to be mean here, but they can be on the male opinionated asshole side. Now I know myself and me, myself and I would probably have kicked his sorry ass to the curb even if I had 12 kids. Just because right before the end of the movie her kids really didn't understand why their father was such a mean and nasty man.

God we women folk, really tolerate a lot of crap in life. I know I did, I cooked, I cleaned, I did his laundry, and did almost everything that my ex wanted done, and it still wasn't enough, to keep him from cheating. My ex is a mean ass, just like the character in the movie, he was always yelling and was rarely happy. His excuse for his shitty behavior, well my dad is a mean ass, and that's just how guys from the Mid West are. We want our women to cook, clean and have a job, at least that was his excuse for being a super douche bag to women.

I'm not quite sure what men want from women? But cheating in America, and I guess the world is a huge past time for a lot of people these days. I personally believe, that if women wouldn't tolerate cheating in their men, by allowing them to have free passes, or by tolerating any of their super lame excuses, for where they have been, and who they where with then things might change. Some women are treated like a frozen dinner, being pulled out of the freezer on a moments notice, and then these types of women will allow themselves to be thrown in these guys sex microwave, which will be set on get hot fast and be ready for sex in two minutes or less. If we said "I will no longer allow you, to treat me like a frozen dinner!" Then maybe some of the worst men that the world has to offer up, wouldn't treat us like we're disposable razors, if we get a little dull, they'll throw us away, only to replace us with another disposable woman.  

Look, I value myself, yes even at my ripe old age of 38. Yes I do! why? Because men are like buses, there is one cumming every 10 minutes. My ex asked me; "we broke up last week, why aren't you over it by now?" Because unlike my scare-crow of an ex boy friend, I have something called a heart. Even though he hit me, even though he insulted me, even though he put me down, and even though he was cheating on me with some ugly, Mexican methed out porn whore, and even though she works at my job, because that dick told her where I worked. But more then anything else, I just wanted things to work out between us. I never did get the apology that I wanted and needed to hear, and I probably never will, and that's just how my life and a lot of other women's life in America and world goes sometimes. Especially when we meet and fall in love with undercover assholes.

When Lenny Kravitz sang; "American woman get away from me"...I for one never thought, that I'd actually be living that line, out of that particular song. But now, I know exactly what those lyrics feel like. Men really expect us, to totally kiss their asses, after they have been caught cheating. This is how I feel about cheating, and this line comes from my favorite heavy metal song; "die mother f*cker die! Die mother f*cker die!" Women have and are going to continue to have their hearts broken, unless more women like myself say; "I will not allow your to treat me that way any longer!" Sometimes you have to get a little crazy, to get what you want out of life. I wanted to be free of the huge weight, that the burden of that relationship was causing my life. Once upon a time, I stayed in another abusive relationship for 7 years, from the age of 17 till the age of 23, and the best years of my life where taken from me, and I can't even remember my kids fathers face now, because of all the abuse that went down in that relationship. I just didn't want to have another repeat of the same type of relationship, where I wound up broken or dead. The first time I was in an abusive relationship, I didn't leave him because I felt bad for all the other women whom would wind up being abused just like me, and I wanted to protect the world from my monster. This time with my last boyfriend, I want to protect myself from this monster, and the chick whom he cheated on me with, whom thought she was f*cking me over...did me the biggest favor of my life, and when he start's kicking the shit out of her and almost kills her. All I can say is; "you get what you deserve!" Why do I feel that way? Because a snake will always be a snake, and if you trust and play with snakes, be prepared to get bit, because you will be bit eventually.    

Women really need to respect themselves, don't ever allow any man to treat you like you're delivered pizza. Where he can have your va-j-j delivered at anytime threw-out the night right to his door. If you find out your with a guy like this, run, because his treatment of you will never get better. Why? Because he won't respect you and doesn't respect any women. His treatment of you will always be shitty, and he will always treat any women in his life the exact same way. Because he doesn't see women as people, he only see's them as sexual objects, that's why! Plus, if all the guy wants sisters is meaningless sex, that's all he's ever going to want from you. If any man want's to play you like a piano, you really have to get out fast, and leave. Trust me you can never get the time back from a shitty relationship, and it's always better to leave sooner then later.

Actually with my last relationship, the age difference was to great. I wanted out, but could never find a way to get away from him. This time when he pissed me off for the billionth time. I took the chance and really made an effort to stay gone and I will never be going back again. Not even for an occasional bang. Why? Because I hate regret...I hate wasting year after year in a stupid relationship, when I could be getting over numb nuts and meeting other guys. Funny thing is my previous abusive ex-never did find the right women, because, he beat everyone of them after I left him. I really believe that this same thing will happen to my latest ex, if he doesn't change. But he's not my problem anymore! Why? Because abusive men rarely change. In the movie the contesting wife's husband finally changed, 10 years before he died. She went on to tell the audience: "to atone for what he had put me threw for all those years, he set aside all his pension checks, which he deposited into an account for me." She really was the nicest lady, whom had a lot of patience, with her mean drunk of a husband. When I was 18, I was that women, but I value my life more then any man's. And if my man is to busy yelling, screaming and calling me-names, while threatening to beat me all the time. Then I don't need him around and neither do you. Why? Because life is valuable and much to short to have to deal with that drama all the time. Someone better will always come along, no matter how old we are. I read a 98 year old women married a 99 year old man. Hey, it could happen.